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Paradigm Shift

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Paradigm Shift: Changing your lens

Changing your thought patterns and beliefs is at the center of growth and development. However, change is difficult. One of the biggest exercises I teach my clients is to change the lens through which they look at themselves and at the world. I remind them that whatever lens they are using is not working and that I am here to help them see and process things differently.  

I use examples from quantum mechanics to help them make this shift. Quantum mechanics is the study of atoms, particles, and sub-particles. The main lesson from quantum mechanics that I have applied to both my personal and professional life comes from physicist John Wheeler.  He said “There is no out there out there.” To me, this means how I perceive the external world is really a reflection of who I am.  If I am happy and content inside, I will notice see smiles and happy faces outside. If I am sad, I will see frowns. If I am angry, I will see others in that light as well. Happiness, sadness, or anger are not outside of me; instead, I give birth to them based on my emotional state. Neuroscience today acknowledges that these emotions and experiences are actually created inside of us, by us.

When I first started reading about all of this, I felt like I had  the  wrong lens. Or rather, I was taught to use the wrong lens. But as I continued to learn, I felt empowered and in control. I was hopeful that my circumstances could change if and when I changed my internal state. I knew I could do that. And at least I didn’t have to wait for the world to stop being sad or angry.

This is the paradigm shift is one of the first and basic steps I teach my clients—the practice of going inwards. Applying these principles in my own life has tremendously helped me in overcoming my limitations and difficulties, and I desire to help my clients do the same.

Dr. Gurpreet Kaur
Dr. Gurpreet Kaur, EdD, LPC

Counselor and coach in Princeton, NJ helping people move beyond coping to lasting inner steadiness. More about Dr. Kaur →

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